Stuck

After having Ryenn and Leah I was miserable.  I hated the way my body did not look like my body.  I was about 25 years old, around 175lbs, and swollen.  My face was chubby....well, you get the idea.  I was never a tiny beauty queen in high school, and always weighed in at a very solid 159.  I was athletic and muscular with what I thought was a lot of fat around my midsection.  Oh how I wish I had embraced it back then.  How reality and experience changes your outlook. 
About 18 months after Leah was born I was still around 170.  I decided enough was enough.  So I started attending Zumba classes.  I will admit that I felt more that a little silly.  There was no, "Learn the moves" session.  You were thrown into the deep end with ladies that had been doing it for years.  They looked like professionals, and I looked like I was five understudies deep.  I was terrible.  Slowly I realized that if I focused on having fun I would be happier.  So, bumbling and fumbling along I attended Zumba classes in the early morning for a year.  I had so much more energy and lost 15lbs. It was great, up until I decided that I was working out so, "Yes, please give me a giant slice of cheese cake," or "Why of course I want that half of the pan of brownies."  Who was I kidding, leave me alone for an hour with a pan of brownies and there will be no evidence of brownies.  That caught up to me.  I even stopped working out for about 4 months.  I finally reached a point where I was not losing or gaining weight. I was just STUCK!

Ingredients for Green Monster
Forgot the banana..ooops

This week I have picked it back up in earnest and I hope to keep it that way.  I really have a lack in self-motivation, but I am planning on announcing every time I mess up and eat chocolate cake (in large quantities mind you).  I have downloaded an app on my iPhone called "Lose it!"  to count calories, keep track of workouts, and maintain my overall eating pattern.  I have resumed Zumba, and have discussed weight loss competition between John and myself. 

I have also been introduced to a smoothie called "Green Monster."  I learned that the oh so delicious creamer that I had been putting in my coffee (in rough tbsp) was 280 calories total.  YIKES.  More than 2 cups of Cocoa Puffs.  Yeah.  So I am going to substitute the Green Monster for my breakfast and my lunch until I go crazy from lack of food, and switch to just breakfast.  I am officially 156 as of today, and hope to lose 10 more pounds.  New tattoo after that.....maybe.

Bottoms up