Some late complaining (if you have yet to see the Twilight film, and want to....I would suggest turning back)

This complaining is late...in more ways than one! First of all, yes, I am up at frickin' 3:30am. I don't know why, and I have no way to explain it. I really do wish I was asleep. It is also late in that I watched the Twilight movie just a few days after it first came out. I figure now is a good a time as any to complain.

I didn't really have any expectations for the movie at all since I really disliked the books. (not part of the bandwagon..on either team jacob or edward) I went with my mom (whom had read the books and loved them), Brigette, and her mother (both of whom had yet to read the books). Brigette was basing her decision on whether or not she enjoyed the film...I told her not to hold her breath.

So we get to the theatre, the lights go dim, the collective breath is held. I have got to say that the actress that played the role of Bella was Awful! (yes that deserved a capital A) It was physically painful to watch her do everything....from walking to any facial expression. It really seemed as though she was reading her script aloud for the first time. With the first glimpse of the "preternatural vampires" all I could think was that they looked like someone slapped clown's make-up on them. I couldn't even suppress hearty laughter! My mom all but smacked me. (*I have to take a time out for a crying baby*)

Okay, I have returned, and at the more reasonable hour of 11:00! YEA! On with the rant. For those of you who were not lame enough to read the books, Edward belongs to the Cullen Family. They are a coven of vampires that do not stalk human as their food source. They drink the blood of animals and such. Jasper, the newest addition of that family, is supposed to be struggling with restraint. He is trying not to attack an kill every single student he is enrolled with. In the film his character just looks like he is struggling with the inability to control his bowls. (not a pretty picture, but honest truth)

These vampires are also extremely fast. The special affects to display this quality....blurry, fast moving appendages. Seriously. This was way to cartoon like for my taste. They are also supposed to have prismatic skin while in direct sunlight. Could that effect have looked any more like little girls pretend make-up? Shiny Barbie glitter rubbed on Edward.

I honestly don't know how many times that I laughed during the film. I even think that at one point I was falling asleep. Afterward my mom told me that she was embarrassed to be sitting next to me. Oh well. If I do attend the second movie in the Twilight series, it will be out of my deep love for my mother.